Monday, June 02, 2008
Rachael Ray, nose-picking, and other Randoms
by Anonymous at 10:19 AM
- You can tell a lot about a person based on whether or not they think the movie Beer Fest is funny.
- Have you ever thought that the meaning of "no-brainer" should be the exact opposite of how it's used?
Hey Billy, why'd you stick your finger in that light socket?
It was a no-brainer.
- I’m planning on saving one of my forever stamps for like 20 years just for spite. I’m getting my money’s worth on one of these things.
- Who am I kidding? I’ll probably lose it.
- I’m on the last sheet of paper in my notepad at work. Getting a replacement is kind of a hassle [not really], so you can bet that this last page will look pretty crazy by the end of the week. I’m sure by Wednesday I will have moved on to the cardboard backing.
- When you heard that Rachael Ray was wearing an Arab scarf in a Dunkin Donuts commercial, weren’t you expecting something different? I’ll admit, after I saw the picture, I was disappointed. Am I not allowed to wear a scarf now?
- Do you remember when $100 was a lot of money? Now if I go to any store and only spend $100, I feel like I did a good job.
- I had a moment recently where I remembered something funny from my childhood, and then I started laughing at it. The memory wasn’t really sparked by anything, so to an outsider looking on, I’m sure I looked insane.
- The moment was probably from 2nd or 3rd grade. Paul Munich was the kid in class who always picked his nose. He was chosen by the teacher to captain one of the kickball teams during recess, so the teacher said to him, “Paul, you pick first.” Then Sean Anderson, without skipping a beat, said “Paul always gets to pick first” while pretending to stick his finger in his nose. Oh that Sean Anderson. I think the teacher yelled at him for it, but afterwards in her Miss Lippy-style alone time, I bet even she had a good laugh.
- Mark Prior’s season ended over the weekend after it was revealed that he has a tear in his throwing shoulder. That’s a shame too because he was just starting to get good movement on those towels [courtesy of Donald].
- Whatever, it’s a good joke if you get it. If you don’t then I’m sorry.
- On that note, remember that if not for the last place you look, nothing would ever be found.
Mark Prior's season would only have ended if it had begun in the first place. I want to know who his PR guy is - he's made a living for the past two years by conning MLB clubs - because he's been under contract the entire time and yet hasn't thrown a pitch since August 2006.