1 Happy St

Headline seen: Prognosis on [Kerry] Wood not good
You know, if he was a horse, he'd have been shot by now.

Okay, so Al Gore's house uses a lot of energy. Sure, that would make him a hypocrite, but does that make his message wrong?

And Mr. Gore, if what you say is true, I really don't think me changing out my lightbulbs is gonna fix it. Come to me when you have a real solution. I'd even be willing to pay higher utility bills.

You know what the best part of a 75 degree day in late March is? There's potential for 6 more months of this.

But seriously, guy with the lawnmower on Sunday morning, was that really necessary?

Why doesn't every Major League Baseball team play the same schedule? I understand the reasoning in football (it's only a 16 game schedule). But the baseball season is 162 games. I think that's more than enough time to make it even.

You can always tell when the service representative you're on the phone with either gets his phone monitored or is surveyed afterwards by the customer. For the record Shaun from Chrysler Roadside Assistance, you did an excellent job.

Have you ever noticed that baking soda is used for like 218 different things, none of which are baking?

"You know, you've been dressing a lot nicer since you got married" is not a compliment. Neither is "so, the wife's got you cooking now?"