Monday, February 18, 2008

The Anti-Movie cliché

I want to make a movie that pokes fun at movie clichés. Like you know when a movie character falls from a balcony, they’re probably going to hit a glass coffee table that’s perfectly positioned on the bottom floor and smash it into a billion pieces. Well my movie would have the character hit something soft like a bed or couch and get up with no injuries. Some other ideas:

- A guy will try to steal a car by connecting two wires beneath the dashboard to get it to start, but instead the car won’t do anything and he’ll get caught by the police.

- One character will recite a bible passage to a 2nd character, but the 2nd character will have no idea which chapter or verse it was.

- A character will be standing in the middle of a street. A city bus will pass in front of them. After the bus passes, the character will still be shown standing there in the middle of the street.

- The main character will be in a piano bar and ask the piano player to play a specific song. The piano player will say “I’m sorry, I don’t know that one”.

- A male character will change a baby’s diaper without being peed on, and they won’t complain about the smell. And they certainly won’t dispose of it using a pair of tongs.

- The main character won’t be rich. He/she won’t be in advertising, a doctor, a professional sports star, CEO of an international corporation, or editor of a popular New York magazine. They’ll be a brick layer or something. Or work on some kind of helpdesk answering phones.

- A character will go to a restaurant and order their hamburger well done.

- The main character will have to catch someone at the airport before they board a plane. But rather than hopping out of their car at the terminal while a security guard yells at them that they can’t park there, they’ll go to the trouble of searching through a crowded lot for an open space.

- A character will be chased through a crowded city on foot, but will make it all the way through without being hit by a car.

- The hero will get his ass kicked at the end, followed by rolling credits.

Got any more ideas?

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  1. CRM Says:

    You would have to try to fit in a high school basketball team that doesnt make the championship game

  2. CRM Says:

    I thought of another one. Matthew McConnaghy would be in it and he would not ruin the movie.

  3. Anonymous Says:

    I see where you're going with that. Although I would have gone with Chris Klein.

  4. maygan Says:

    A woman gets sick every morning for three days, it turns out she has the 'flu.

    The huge scary monster chasing the girl actually runs instead of walks, and get a cramp in his side.

    A rooftop chase ends when the guy tries to jump across the air shaft and plummets to the ground.

    Guns only shoot exactly how many bullets they are designed to shoot.

    Also, check out The opposite of what you're going for here, but quite funny.

  5. maygan Says:

    p.s. i just remarked to someone the other day that i cannot figure out why chris klein still has a career. he is really awful.

  6. Erin Says:

    I would love for someone to get hung up on and not immediately hear the dial tone. That is not what happens when someone is hung up on. A simple click followed by silence would suffice.

  7. Erin Says:

    When a woman who is home alone hears a strange noise coming from upstairs she will grab her coat and cell phone and immediately call the police while driving away.

  8. Anonymous Says:

    Yes, I love them all. Or if she's being chased through the forest and the knife-wielding murderer chasing after her keeps falling down.

    And just once I'd like to see a political movie that featured a monologue joke from Dave instead of Jay. Jay sucks.