Tuesday, December 12, 2006

You sit on a throne of lies!

I think my 6 year old is done with Santa. Sure, it's a little sad, but mostly, it's a relief. Santa sucks. We'd go out and spend all that money on presents and that fat bastard gets all the credit!

I figured this out a couple years ago and ever since, I've been deliberately setting Santa up. The boys would come down Christmas morning and all the presents would be under the tree. The ones from Mom and Dad were wrapped but the ones from Santa weren't, so it would be clear what was from whom. Last year, Santa got them a couple of dinky toys, some clothes and some candy in their stockings. Meanwhile, Mom and Dad wrapped all the really good presents so the boys would know they were from us. It never mattered anyway, because by the end of the day, after being intoxicated with sugarplums, Santa still got all the credit! Some-of-a...!

This year my 6 year old got wise to the whole charade. Look who's ho-ho-hoing now, Chubby! And I'm eating all the cookies, too!

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