Thursday, January 15, 2009

Shouldn't they be called "womannequins"?

Okay I have an idea for a movie. Here me out, I think it’s rock solid. Hey, Rock Solid, that’s a pretty decent porn name. Alright, so this idea: a down-on-his-luck man in his mid-20’s keeps going from job to job, but can’t seem to find anything he’s good at, nor anything he enjoys. It seems like every day he has a new job, and every day he gets fired. Silly, right? Yeah, but also awesome. Until one day, he gets a job as a night cleanup boy at a large department store. Oh you see where I’m going with this.

His first night at his new job, he’s not all that enthused with what he’s doing, but at the same time, he can’t help but notice that he enjoys creating mannequins. Did I lose you? I may have, but please hear me out. So he ends up creating this beautiful mannequin who comes to life whenever the two of them are alone together and she helps him create ridiculous window displays at the department store that become so wickedly popular that they end up increasing the store’s foot-traffic to the point where the store is saved from pending bankruptcy. Okay so the idea is still a little wet behind the ears, but the premise is almost too perfect not to be made into a movie, am I right? There will also be a sub-plot or two where a competing department store manager tries to get him fired, there’ll be a bumbling security guard of course, maybe a gay guy or two and a jealous former girlfriend. Look, all the details haven’t been written yet. But I think I’m onto something here.

Oh, the mannequin. You may be wondering how she comes to life. Well that’s the beauty of Hollywood. We don’t really have to explain it. Maybe she can be from ancient Egypt or something and she’s come here via some kind of portal or….you know what, that’s not important. What is important is I think I have a Rock Solid (still a good name) movie idea that needs to be made ASAP.
By now, you may be wondering what the point of all that was. A few nights ago, I fell asleep with the TV on and I woke up at like 1 AM to this classic 80’s montage playing in the background. I ended up staying awake and watching the rest. Don’t judge me; you would have too.

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  1. Dave Rees Says:

    That's truly scary, because I'd never seen the movie before (though I knew of it), and wound up tuning in to the same montage last week. Must look away!! That section gave me the entire plot. Oh the humanity!

  2. Jane Says:

    I'm not ashamed to admit that I have seen this movie more times than I can remember, and that this is my favorite part. That song is damnn catchy too.