Wednesday, November 07, 2007

I committed fraud too. Take me away

Former Illinois Governor George Ryan is on his way to prison for the next 6.5 years (probably much much less time than that) after being convicted of fraud in April of 2006. He will serve his time in a minimum security prison in Oxford, WI. The reason he’s going to prison in the first place is because he took bribes while operating as Illinois’ Secretary of State, which resulted in people getting their drivers licenses who shouldn’t have, as well as blah blah blah nobody cares anymore; it’s finally over.

A couple thoughts and then I’ll leave it alone:

1. He was convicted in April of 2006. It is currently November of 2007. What the hell?!?!

2. He will serve his time in a minimum security prison in Oxford, WI. People who have been to Oxford Prison have said it’s kind of like staying at a college dorm. No gates, no guards with guns. Just drunken frat parties and keggers. Okay maybe not, but almost. So why is he complaining about having to go? Who wouldn’t want to stay in all day, watch some television, work out, have food prepared for you 3 times a day, and play some cards? The man is 73 years old; that’s probably his daily routine now. The only change for him will be the clothes he has to wear and his wife won’t be there.

Seriously, what’s not to like?

[Editor's Note: This is not the official opinion of Brian. He was merely making a sarcastic observation regarding what Georgie's prison-life will be like. On the contrary, Brian loves his marriage and wouldn't give it up for anything. But ask him again when he's in his 70's]

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  1. Jane Says:

    I'm curious. Why a Wisconsin prison? I know there are prisons in Illinois.

  2. Brian Says:

    We don't like to flood our prisons with dangerous criminals like George Ryan.

  3. Jane Says:

    Dangerous, that's funny. :)

    No wonder Wisconsinites call you guys FIB'ers, sending all your dangerous riff raff to their state!