1 Happy St

Bunions sound like a failed product from Frito Lay.

There are two kinds of people: People that can recite every line to every Monty Python bit, and the people that think all those people are idiots. I'm sure you were a hit at your high school musical cast party, but I'm sorry. I just don't get it.

I always thought it unfair that 1, 2 and 3 get ST, ND and RD's but 4 through 20 are all stuck with TH's.

I don't care what anyone says. Candy Land is a way better game than Chutes and Ladders. What's worse than getting to square 87 and having to take that long frigging chute back to 24? Plus, I never liked any game that used a spinner. Every spinner sucked. Yes, I'm look at you, Game of Life!

What happened to Jim Carrey?

I have 3 kids, but we've been really bad at getting pictures taken of my 11-month-old Jack, so I really only have pictures of Andy (7) and Joshua (4) at my desk. I have a baby picture of Joshua that looks just like Jack though, so that works, right?

I really want to buy an iPhone soon. Because if history has taught us one thing, it's that cell phones and mp3 players never come down in price.

They say that breast implants are becoming a common gift from parents to daughters for college graduation. If the parents were smart, they'd buy the girls implants for high school graduation instead, to help her earn some money to pay her own way through college. That just seems like the smarter investment to me.

Do I end the week on a breast implant joke? Yes. Yes I do.