Tuesday, December 18, 2007

What's the lesson here? I'm always right

One thing that Jill has learned about me since we got married is that I have a wealth of knowledge about things that are completely unnecessary to have any knowledge about whatsoever. Most of the time when I get to show it off, she'll just shake her head and think to herself, "oh my goodness, I'm stuck with you the rest of my life". I think deep down, she just hates it when I'm right, because whenever I am, I celebrate it by jumping up and down, smiling from ear to ear, and reminding her for the next hour or so until she punches me in the face.

One day about a year ago, I was flipping through the preview guide on the television and I saw that the movie "Back to School" was on. Jill was sitting next to me, saw that my eyes lit up, and immediately said "no, we're not watching that." I replied with "wait, let me just guess which part of the movie is showing right now." I was going to base my guess on where in the movie the preview guide said they were. I then said a line from the movie that I figured (hoped) would be coming up soon and turned the channel. Honest to God, within 2 seconds, the line I had just uttered was being spoken in the movie. Jill turned to me and said "oh my goodnness, I'm stuck with you the rest of my life". Needless to say, I was quite proud of myself. And also needless to say, if things like this could go on a resume', I'd have a much better resume'.

Fast-forward to last night: Jill and I were in the car driving around and finishing up some of our Christmas shopping. I told her that I was going to turn on the satellite radio to the 90's station (by the way, if you don't have satellite radio, you should get it just for the 90's station. Granted, they play a lot of late-90's crap like Third Eye Blind and Everclear, but there's also an abundance of Pearl Jam, Smashing Pumpkins, and other stuff that reminds me of Greg). Before I turned it on, I asked Jill to guess which band would be playing. Of course she wanted no part of that game. She probably realized the odds were 1 in 5000 or so to guess correctly, not to mention the game itself is really stupid. But I didn't care; I was playing. So I threw out Alice in Chains. Even now, I'm not sure why I said that because when they were popular, I never particularly cared for them. They had some songs I liked, but were never one of my favorites. But as soon as I turned on the radio, we heard this: "Heeeeeere, they come to snuff the rooster. Oh yeah. You know he ain't gonna die." Of course my face lit up like I had just won the lotto. Jill looked at me and didn't know what to say. But I think today she's filing for divorce.

Yeahhhhhhh, here come the rooster!

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  1. Jeremy Says:

    You didn't like Everclear? I liked that they said the word yeah after just about every line in their song. Me and my friends used to make fun of that in H>S. There's a chance this is funnier to me than it will be to you.