Thursday, October 26, 2006

Looks like someone has a case of the haphazards, accidentals, and arbitraries:

- Sometimes I get House Speaker Dennis Hastert and actor Dennis Haysbert confused. To make things worse, Dennis Hastert kind of looks like former Illinois Secretary of State George Ryan, which causes me to get current Illinois Secretary of State Jesse White and actor Dennis Haysbert confused in a roundabout way. If Jesse White ever says “it is very bad to drink Jobu’s rum” or “that’s Allstate’s stand” during a speech, my head may explode.

- Okay, I’ll say it. That Michael J. Fox commercial freaks me out.

- I just read that the chances of winning the grand prize in the McDonald’s monopoly game are 1 in 4.5 trillion. Which means I have a better chance of being struck by lightning while cashing in my winning lotto ticket.

- Speaking of odds, what were the chances that NBC would have two pilots in the same season that revolved around the inner-workings of a sketch comedy show, and is it possible to be a fan of one or the other without being confused about which one you’re watching? A special thanks to NBC for making the titles similar.

- Okay, I’ll say it Part II. Joel Zumaya scares me. Not quite as much as Ray Lewis, but it’s getting close. The next prison movie that comes out should have Zumaya playing the Mexican group leader.

- Since the E! Channel cut down on the number of SNL reruns it airs at night, I can now come up with exactly zero reasons why that channel still exists.

- I looked up my own name on Wikipedia and it brings me to a guy from California who is younger than me who develops video game software. If this info was put there by anybody other than him, I may have to kill myself.

- I think I can go turn on the television right now, flip through every channel I have, and there’s a better than 90% possibility that I’d be able to find some version of Law and Order on. And yet I don’t know a single person that watches any of them.

- I think I may have accidentally discovered that my right foot is bigger than my left. About a year ago, I bought a pair of dress shoes with no laces and I noticed that the left shoe was loose on my foot while the right shoe fit snuggly. So I simply chalked it up to a defective shoe. But last week, I bought a new pair of the exact same style and am now having the same problem. This cannot be a coincidence, can it?

1 comments:

  1. Greg Says:

    "Since the E! Channel cut down on the number of SNL reruns it airs at night, I can now come up with exactly zero reasons why that channel still exists."

    So you're not a fan of House of Carters? Every time I've stumbled across it, its been pure unadulterated unintentional comic genius!