1 Happy St

From Roland S. Martin:

It is total hypocrisy for the naysayers of embattled Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich to assert that he didn't have the legal right to appoint Roland Burris to fill the U.S. Senate seat vacated by President-elect Barack Obama.

Hypocrisy? Really? Hmm, you've got my attention. Tell me why.

It seems a lot of folks are excited and happy that Illinois Secretary of State Jesse White took a stand by refusing to sign the paperwork certifying Burris as the Senate appointee. Yet what these same folks somehow refuse to recognize is that Blagojevich isn't some guy sitting around in his office, twiddling his fingers, flipping through the cable channels with a remote and waiting to get impeached. He is still carrying out his duties as governor.

Yeah I know. A crying shame, right? This a-hole is still making decisions. Go on though.

Did you know that since his arrest in December, Blagojevich has pardoned 22 people? I haven't heard a huge outcry over this tainted governor setting folks free.

22 people? Are you serious? You're right, there should be outcry. Perhaps this is something that should be reported a bit more by the media. Hey, you're the media, right Roland? I'm so glad you're touching on this.

Did you know that Blagojevich continues to sign bills that were passed by the General Assembly?

For reals? This is getting out of hand.

Did you know that two days ago, Blagojevich, as determined by state law, set March 3 as the primary and April 7 as the general election to fill the congressional seat of Rahm Emanuel, who resigned after agreeing to become Obama's chief of staff?

No I didn't. But thanks for telling me. It's a [bleeping] joke that this man is still in office. I should ask though, is there a point to all of this?

I was one of the many voices who said that in light of what he was arrested for, Blagojevich should resign his seat because his presence paralyzes state government. And I still believe that. But we are way beyond that now. He chose not to do so, which is his right.

Ugh. So much for arguing the correct point.

While I was out driving during lunch, I ended up behind a car that had a bumper sticker that said "DON'T BLAME ME: I VOTED FOR DUKAKIS". I'm surprised I didn't get into an accident afterwards because I spent the rest of my trip trying to figure out how the hell that bumper sticker came to be at that exact moment.

First of all, it wasn't on an old car. I could see if the car was from the 1980's or something, then I could chalk up the sticker's reason for existing that it just wouldn't come off the bumper. But this car was a newer Toyota, no older than 5 years or so. Was it put on there ironically? Or was it to be funny (like that time I put a bumper sticker on my car that was a Spanish translation of "please buckle up")? Or was its owner really using a bumper sticker to express 20 years worth of frustration?

Second of all, where the bleep did they get it? Where does one find a Michael Dukakis bumper sticker? I bet Michael Dukakis doesn't even have a Michael Dukakis bumper sticker.

All these questions, no answers. Frustrating lunch.

Here is a quote from Rod Blagojevich earlier Wednesday morning:

"I can't wait to begin to tell my side of the story and to address you guys and, most importantly, the people of Illinois. That's who I'm dying to talk to. There's a time and place for everything. That day will soon be here and you might know more about that today, maybe no later than tomorrow."

There's a lot of non-information in there. Luckily, I'm here to translate:

"I can't wait to begin to tell my side of the story and to address you guys and, most importantly, the people of Illinois. It's been over a week since I was arrested and I would have given the people of Illinois my side of the story sooner, but my lawyers hadn't come up with what that side of the story was yet. They're preparing a statement for me though and I think it's just about completed. I'll be honest, I'm looking forward to reading it too. They're some smart people, those lawyers of mine. And the charges against me are pretty straight-forward. I mean I'm on fucking tape trying to sell a Senate job. Believe me, I'm intrigued for my statement just as much as you are."

Let's recap the charges against my governor Rod Blagojevich:

Charge #1 He tried to sell the appointment of Barack Obama's vacant seat in the Illinois Senate. I'm not sure the alleged extent of it, but it looks like he was willing to give that seat to the highest bidder. In a taped conversation, he was overheard saying "[he's] not willing to give me anything but appreciation, so fuck him."

First of all, the fact that a state's governor has this much power is silly. Why is he allowed to pick? I never understood that. And second of all, in the awesomeness scale that uses arbitrarily-chosen numbers based on nothing whatsoever, that quote is 17 degrees of awesomeness. It takes a certain kind of dumbass to abuse power that was abusive to begin with. Why rock that boat? It's like a kid who is given permission from his parents to stay up late to watch a little bit more television, but he uses that time to watch soft-core porn. Yeah, it's exactly like that.

Charge #2 The FBI also alleges that Blagojevich tried to use the Chicago Tribune's sale of the Cubs as leverage to obtain favorable treatment in the paper's editorial pages.

This one is even better. Every politician is out for money; that's not really news. But in the 2nd charge, it seems as though he's on a mission to stop free speech. That may just be 18 or 19 arbitrarily-chosen degrees of awesomeness. As I understand it, the director of the Trib's editorial page (John McCormick) has been critical of Rod, so the FBI caught our governor on tape with his chief of staff (John Harris) saying things like "fire those bleeps" and "get em the bleep out of there" and "bleep these bleeping bleeps with their bleeping bleeps and their bleeping bleeps". I may have made up one of those.

But the point is that he didn't appreciate that a newspaper's editorial page was being critical of him, so he was doing all he could to get the whole staff fired. I must say, coming on the heels of that newspaper filing for bankruptcy, this has not been a good week for print media. So long Free Press. It was nice knowing you.

And if these charges are true, so long Rod Blagojevich. Knowing you was not as nice. I hope your cellmate shaves that bird's nest on your head while you sleep.

Was your Governor just arrested? No? Hmm, well that means you're not from Illinois. We arrest our governors around here. Two for our last two. Yeah that's right.

If you were only able to catch one of the debates, don't worry. You got the gist.

Via here

I find it interesting that Joe Biden is a liar for his inaccurate spending figures in Afghanistan, but Sarah Palin isn't a liar for saying Obama "pals around with terrorists who would target their own country".

I haven't seen a stretch that far since seeing [something that stretched really far].

My observation after hearing a lot of other people's thoughts on last night's debate: Those who lean to the right think Palin won while those who lean to the left think Biden won.

Shocking.

I could have spent the evening watching something entirely different and I would have known what everyone's thoughts on the debates would have been. And let's be honest; people who actually watched last night have probably made up their minds already. One such person who has made up his mind is my co-worker Sam. He leans so far to the left that he looks like a backslash. He doesn't have a blog, but he certainly has some feelings on what went down. So I agreed to allow him to post them here.

Sam, the floor is yours:
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1. I thought Gwen Ifill was terrible. I am not sure if she cowed to the Republican’s attacks on her based on her upcoming book about the African American politicians or because of the format. One thing is clear, she flopped big time. She could have made sure there were follow-up questions and/or she could have let the candidates address each other.
2. Sarah Palin didn't "screw up". Talk about the audacity of low expectations. She can actually repeat talking points. WOW. If this is the threshold a VP should pass, we're in deep sh*t as a nation. Tell me it ain't so Joe!!! What's also amazing to me is the similarity between George Bush and Sarah Palin's style and substance (or lack thereof). They both come across as likable, next door neighbor-types that you might consider having a beer with. But it's frustrating to me that they think that they are ready to lead this country. Thank god Bush's record is in full display. Hopefully, the folks that voted for him will not make the same mistake again. But then again, you never know. That's why I believe that voting should only be cast by folks with an IQ over 100.
3. Joe Biden came off a little bit shaky at the start. He didn't know how to address Sarah Palin. But as the interview dragged on, he became more comfortable and really showed his command of the subject matter. On substance, he won the debate hands down.
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Is there a guest-poster who would like to offer counterpoints?

As a child, Sarah Palin used to go hunting with her dad; she's a common man. Er, woman.

Sarah Palin smoked cannabis as a youth (no she didn't; she smoked weed); she's a common man. Er, woman.

Sarah Palin isn't elitist. She's a hockey dad. Er, mom. (by the way, hockey mom? what the hell is a hockey mom? first there was soccer mom, now there's hockey mom? aren't there any american sports that these moms can point their kids towards? why no baseball or football moms?)

Sarah Palin has never been to Europe; she's a common man. Er, woman.

Sarah Palin didn't go to an Ivy League School; she's a common man. Er, woman.
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Okay, I like her. I'd like to hang out with her. I wish her family lived next door to me. But can we please stop with this common woman bullshit? When did going to an Ivy League school become a negative? When did traveling the world become a negative?

This country has gone insane.

Thank goodness this isn't the man who's representing the republican party. What a jackass.

I have a serious question I'd like to pose to him, as well as to everyone who clapped when he said it. Do you really think that the biggest threat to the United States is terrorism?

Honestly?

That's our biggest threat? Not people losing their jobs or houses? Not the value of our money? Friggin' terrorism? Let's think about that for a second. How many people from the United States have died in the last 50 years as the result of a terrorist attack? I don't know the answer, I'm seriously asking it. Is it less than 5000? No, it's more? 10,000? I really don't know, but I would doubt it's more than that. I'd even doubt it's more than 5000. And most of those happened in 1 day. So putting that in perspective, there's over 300 million citizens of the United States, with countless millions more (actually it's probably not countless; I could probably look something like that up somewhere, but this is a stupid blog and I'm not a journalist) that have been citizens of the United States in the last 50 years. So what kind of problem is terrorism really?

It's a scary thought I guess, but not our biggest problem.

Jackass.

Also, Sarah Palin is wicked cool. Smart, smart lady. Regardless of who wins this thing, I'm just glad that our next President and Vice-President are going to be well-spoken.

What were your thoughts on Joe Biden's speech last night? I thought it was pretty sub par. He said of his wife Jill, she’s the only one who leaves him breathless and speechless at the same time. What does that mean? Show me a woman who leaves me breathless AND speechless, and I’ll show you a bitch. The breathless part I get; it's corny, but I get it. But what does it mean if your wife leaves you speechless? Speak up, Man. You may just be our Vice President.

I would also like to know more about McCain’s support of tax breaks to businesses that outsource their work that Biden mentioned. Was he implying that McCain supports tax breaks to corporations BECAUSE they outsource, or just tax breaks to companies that DO. That’s kind of a big difference, no?

And then with the "that’s not change, that’s more of the same" part. Seriously, who wrote that? I felt like he was reading me a children’s book.

Sub par effort from our potential VP in my opinion. Billy boy was great once again though.

The headlines I see today:

- Unemployment rate hits 20 year high, 49,000 jobs lost.
- Oil prices soar to $135/barrel on supply concerns.
- U.S. dollar weakens.

I know we keep this site apolitical most of the time. And I know Greg said in a comment earlier this week that he prefers a government that let's him decide how to run his life. And I agree with that. But don't the above headlines make you wonder why our government is allowing this to happen? Where are our leaders? Are there people on the case right now that are trying to figure out ways to prevent our entire economic system from breaking down? Because that's what's happening. And I'm not speaking for myself here. At least not yet. I'm talking about the people who lived paycheck to paycheck BEFORE gas prices reached $4/gallon. The construction worker who drives his big truck to the job site every day. The taxi/limo drivers. The self-employed guy/gal who doesn't have the luxury of working from home. How are these people making it? The answer is that they're not. They're failing. And you know what happens once they do? Our government has to help them. That's right, they're going to have to rely on the people who failed them in the first place for help. Our leaders told us to keep spending and the economy would be fine. They even gave us back some of our money to do it. But what they failed to realize (or didn't mention) was that for the past 2 years, we've been racking up credit card debt. So that $600 they gave us didn't go to the mall or Best Buy. No, it went to Visa. Or it went towards our $70/week gasoline bill. Nice friggin plan Genius's. It's all bullshit. So now today, the only thing we hear in regards to our government is whether or not Hillary is going to be Obama's running mate. Or whether or not McCain is too old. You know what? Who the fuck cares about that? What about today?!?! At this rate, we're not even going to make it to November.

From me where I make fun of Hillary not yet conceding the election in my blog post titled "Hillary Clinton = George Costanza?" - Like tonight after the White Sox lose to the Royals 2-1, can Crazy Bones tell his team to stay on the field? "Dis game iz not over. Deez kidz play hard and we no give up." I can see that working, at least for a little while until they turn the lights off. It's worth a shot though. It's been working for Hillary for the last month or so.

Now this from Jon Stewart as he was talking to Terry McAuliffe on the Daily Show on Tuesday night - I love the New York Mets. Last year they had a late-season collapse, they didn’t make the playoffs. Convince me they won the World Series.

So it's not exact, but the idea is the same. Of course the execution by Jon was a lot better. But I still feel awesome right now.

About Barack Obama's elitism - [He] has bought into the concept that Barack Obama is too elitist and not at all like the real and authentic folk. Well, first off, there’s the sickening absurdity of the whole elitist concept — the man is RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT. Of course he thinks he’s elite. So does McCain, Hill, Bob Barr, and anyone else who has the audacity to believe that he/she should be the President of the United States. Please. How in the hell can someone raise hundreds of millions of dollars and travel non-stop around the country to tell people again and again why he is the right choice — the only choice — to become the world’s most powerful person and NOT BE ELITIST? Ripping a presidential candidate for being elitist to me is like ripping your heart surgeon for being a perfectionist.

Good stuff.

Embattled Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick may have outdone himself. Under pressure to leave office in the midst of a sex scandal and felony charges of misconduct of office, obstruction of justice, purgery and conspiracy (among others), Kilpatrick has so far ignored all requests to step down.

The Detroit city council recently passed a resolution urging Michigan Governor Jennifer Granholm to remove him from office. Mayor Kilpatrick's response? He vetoed the resolution. Isn't that awesome?

"We vote to remove you!"
"Veto."

Since it was a non-binding resolution that simply requested the action of the Governor, it is clear that he didn't have the legal authority to veto anything, prompting Council attorney Bill Goodman to call Kilpatrick "brainless". But you have to applaud the effort. What a douche!

George W. Bush: "Hey Fellas. We haven't done anything bat-shit crazy in a while, and our time left in this office is limited. Anybody got any ideas?"

Advisor #1: "We could announce plans to cancel a holiday. Maybe Halloween or something? It's a pagan holiday anyway."

George W. Bush: "Nah, I kinda like Halloween. I get to dress up and stuff. Halloween stays. Any other ideas?"

Advisor #2: "What about adding a holiday? I know a lot of people that wish there were more days off in August. August has nothing."

George W. Bush: "I like your style. In fact, write that down; we need to do something about August. But c'mon people. I need crazy. Give me something totally bat-shit crazy. We've done it before, I know we can do it again."

Advisor #3: "How about we take that research lab of contagious animal diseases that we have on that isolated island and move it onto the U.S. mainland? How does that sound?"

George W. Bush: "Hot damn we got a winner! You wanna write up the paperwork
Jimmy?"

Advisor #3: "It's Danny, Sir."

George W. Bush: "Whatever Bobby. Have it on my desk by morning."

So what could have inspired this [fake] dialogue? Read for yourself. Ain't he the best?

A 22-year-old aspiring singer from NJ turned hooker? Didn't Piper Perabo play her in a movie once?

Find out all the great things Barack Obama has done for you here...

Barack Obama is your new bicycle.

I plan on voting, but am I the only one who sees P. Diddy in a shirt like this and feel the urge not to vote? It reminds me of when I was a kid and I created an extremely low-budgeted sign for my bedroom door that said "knock or die". Surely I didn't believe that someone unfortunate enough to walk into my bedroom without knocking would immediately keel over. But looking back, the whole thing seems very juvenile. Then again I was 13. I guess I just have a problem seeing a grown man in a "Vote or Die" t-shirt. I'd prefer that he got specific, like "Vote for Obama, or my hired goons will kill you". Or "Vote for Rudy, or HIS hired goons will kill you". Something like that.