1 Happy St

I thought maybe I'd start a new feature at 1 Happy St. Many periodicals and online magazines have advice columns. I thought it might be fun to take that concept in a new direction and find out what happens when people ask advice of a movie. For this first installment, we welcome our special guest advice columnist, the movie Office Space. Let's begin.

Dear Office Space,
People sometimes tell me that I dress too drab and boring. What can I do to spruce up my wardrobe?
Sign me,
Frumpy in Fargo

Dear Frumpy,
If you want to, you can go ahead and wear a Hawaiian shirt and jeans.

Dear Office Space,
Is it true that too much self-gratification can result in blindness?
Sincerely,
Blurry in Biloxi

Dear Blurry,
Studies have statistically shown that there's less chance of an incident if you do it at the end of the week.

Dear Office Space,
I'm about to start my first year of college. This is both an exciting and nervous time for me. What advice can you give to a member of the class of 2010?
Signed,
Nervous in New Jersey

Dear Nervous,
The trick is: kick someone's ass the first day, or become someone's bitch.